It's the last day of school for me. I have cleaned out my desk, turned in all of my papers, now all I have to do for the next two hours is play around on my computer.
We watched a movie in class, Joyful Noise... but it's over. I really have reached my limit of productive things to do today so I have decided that I am going to write about graduating. I'm not graduating this year, but my best friend Krista is. She has taken the ACT several times, applied to schools and for scholarships, and even purchased the cap and gown. The ceremony is actually tomorrow.
We are pretty much useless at this point in the graduating process because all we can do is bawl... I will be alone for my senior year this August and she will (hopefully) be at College of the Ozarks or OBU. Both of these schools are several miles away. Like a couple hours drive in a car... long enough to sleep during the drive but not far enough away to fly... the frustrating torturous middle.
I made her a scrapbook and we are even having a party at her house. We are gonna watch movies and exchange gifts and eat and cry like little babies.... It's gonna be so much fun! Cannot wait... :(
I can't imagine when it is my turn. I can't see myself in college and out on my own. I say that I can't wait to get out when I'm around my buds... but I'm not so sure. I couldn't even keep my goldfish alive...
And I am getting really crappy advice... My aunt told me that when I move into my first apartment that I should keep like a baseball bat or something handy... this scares me. No... no advice I have received has calmed my nerves...
All I know is that this next school year is gonna really stink...
-KC-
Thursday, May 17, 2012
Tuesday, May 15, 2012
"...I'm not all there myself."
Cheshire Cat: If I were looking for a white rabbit, I'd ask the Mad Hatter.
Alice: The Mad Hatter? Oh, no no no...
Cheshire Cat: Or, you could ask the March Hare, in that direction.
Alice: Oh, thank you. I think I'll see him...
Cheshire Cat: Of course, he's mad, too.
Alice: But I don't want to go among mad people.
Cheshire Cat: Oh, you can't help that. Most everyone's mad here.
[laughs maniacally; starts to disappear]
Cheshire Cat: You may have noticed that I'm not all there myself.
Emily DickinsonMy grandparents are very curious people... as I've told you, I live in a small town in Oklahoma called Westville. I have to say, and I might be biased, that I think for a small town we are doing a pretty good job of beating the stereotype... However, there are a few of us, most of them older, that have trouble adapting to the times. My grandparents are two of them. My papa still has my grandma wait on him, and he makes sure that I am aware that my duties as someones future wife will be to wait on them like Grandma does him.Much Madness is divinest Sense —To a discerning Eye —Much Sense — the starkest Madness —’Tis the MajorityIn this, as All, prevail —Assent — and you are sane —Demur — you’re straightway dangerous —And handled with a Chain —
Now don't get me wrong Grandma is just as bad. I was going to wear converse to my Jr. Prom... until she found out. I got a ten\fifteen minute lecture about how this was unlady like and inappropriate. They are very old fashioned.
So, this in mind, I suppose that it shouldn't have surprised me when, after I told them about a book I had just read (the main character had schizophrenia), they blanched. You see I loved that book, and, believing that all of us are a little crazy\mad in our own way, related to the main character. This worried them. They didn't say exactly why, but I assume that it is because they don't want me associating with "different" people. They really are the product of their generation.
I am not sure what their definition of madness is... I think that it is someone who is different than they are. Grandma saw a lady one day on T.V who was bald, by choice, and went on about it off and on for like thirty minutes. She just couldn't understand why a woman would shave off all of her hair willingly. I tried to explain that some people do that, but she just wouldn't listen to me.
Now, I love my grandparents. I don't agree with them most of the time, but I love them. However I have to disagree with them on this. I don't think that crazy people are so rare.
You see, I think that we all are quirky, my grandparents included.
In Much Madness is Divinest Sense Dickinson is basically saying that the definition of crazy depends on those who buck the system... those who are not in perfect step with the majority are the crazy people. And in one of my favorite books, Alice in Wonderland, The Cheshire Cat has an interesting opinion. That everyone you talk to is crazy. Some more than others, yes, but everyone, all the same. And by the end of Alice's journey, you can find a little bit of madness in her as well.
I have found that the weirdo's are usually the wise ones.
There is a quote that I love by Mark Twain that says this,
This quote relates to the poem by Dickinson. Maybe the best side to be on is the one that everybody turns their nose at. Now, some could use this as an accuse to do crap-head stupid stuff, but you know what I mean when I say that following the crowd usually isn't a good idea.
What about Robert Frosts, The Road Not Taken?
I shall be telling this with a sighAm I a cheesy kid or what? Its true, I am, but here's the thing. This is still true. I don't know how many times I let someone else get bashed because I couldn't break from the mold. I think that most of us do this. But I suppose that this makes sense, most of us would be the majority...
Somewhere ages and ages hence:
Two roads diverged in a wood, and I,
I took the one less traveled by,
And that has made all the difference.
-KC-
Tuesday, May 8, 2012
Chill Pills and Burnouts
I have always had a strange way of looking at life. My thoughts are almost never lined up with the thoughts of others. If you ever need an out-of-the-box, no-question-about-it-its-unique opinion on an issue, ask me. I CAN deliver... Most usually I over think things and end up with a crazy over the line answer to my problems... this only stresses me and the people around me out. The hardest thing for me to do is to just let myself chill out and not worry about things. I see other people do this at school and places, true most of them have like D's and F's in classes, but they don't even worry about that! Some people can be successful and never try hard... I am not one of these people. For an almost Seventeen year old girl, you would think that I would be less of a spazz than I am. Sometimes I really think that I am an old lady trapped in a teens body. However, I have been training myself to be a little bit calmer. Aside from the important stuff where you have to be at least a little stressed or your not doing it right, like school, I am forcing myself to take a chill pill. Take last weekend: Our town was having a burnout. It was loyalty day. For those of you who don't know what loyalty day or a burnout are let me explain. Loyalty Day is where all the country folk in the small town of Westville get together, set up booths and stands and sell various items, for instance, our church set up a grill and a couple of ice chests and sold pop, burgers, and hot dogs ( raising money for camp). Then all the guys and a select few girls get their trucks and vintage cars with nice rims and destroy their tires and drive like maniacs to impress their potential mates and\or to make other dudes jealous (this is the burn out part).
I was set up with my church, making change and keeping track of the money. It was awesome, I got to sit there with a big bag of money, pretend I was rich, and I didn't have to leave my lawn chair. I had a Pepsi and a hot dog... I was a happy girl. Then I realize I hadn't seen my little brother. I shouldn't say little, he's fourteen and going on six feet. Not quite there yet. Anyway, earlier that day he had stalked off with his band friends near the front door of the school to get his saxophone and walk to the community center for the parade portion of Loyalty Day (he was marching). I assumed that he would find our booth after marching and help us (he had to raise money for camp as well). He did not do this. As if this wasn't enough, I realized , with a start, that his cell phone was at home charging next to the T.V... He didn't have my dads new phone number memorized. At this point I was on the verge of hyperventilating.
Several explanations as to where he could be floated into my mind:
- He has been kidnapped, and like the main character in my new favorite T.V show Awake, I will have to use clues from my dreams to find his location. I will also have to purchase a gun and learn how to shoot because the perpetrator must be delt with.
- He is out behind the school kissing some girl... (I will also need a gun for this one).
- He has found a way to contact my dad and is now safe at home in his bed, playing bloody video games and fighting dragons... (this is the least likely)...
I should tell you that I had never met this Jesse kid before this moment. I just knew who he was because Lawrence pointed him out at school. As his head turns to see whose yelling at him the kid spots me and looks at me like I have grown a third head and reluctantly, with a tight grip on his sisters arm, walks slowly toward the crazy lady in the lawn chair.
Once he is a safe ten yards away from my chair, far enough away that he can run if I attack but close enough that he can hear me talk at a normal human volume, he says, "Yeah?"
I respond with a breathless, stress filled, "Wheres Lawrence?"
"I don't know, I guess he went home."
This was not good enough for me. "You guess? Did you see him go home?"
"The last time I saw him he was getting in the car." My heart stopped. I was trying to remember walmarts number for my gun purchase.
"What car?"
At this point, Jesse sighs, so much for my first impression. "Your car. He slid the front seat by your dad, so I'm gonna guess it was your car." His words dripped with sarcasm. I didn't like this kid... he was rude. However despite my irritation with Mr. Snot bag relief flooded through me. I thanked Jesse and he almost ran with his sister in tow... So see? I'm getting better... I never would have been that calm in that situation before I decided to chill....
-KC-
Friday, May 4, 2012
Where Does Wisdom Come From?
"Some things don't matter much. Like the color of a house. How big is that in the overall scheme of life? But lifting a person's heart--now, that matters. The whole problem with people is...they know what matters, but they don't choose it...The hardest thing on earth is choosing what matters.”
― The Secret Life of Bee's by Sue Monk Kidd
I absolutely love this book. I have just finished it for the millionth time. Really it is a book everyone should read. Every girl anyway. There are some really amazing life lessons in it, its like even the simplest things seem profound when coming from the mouth of August Boatright. As an avid reader, you sometimes come across a character who is so real and to whom you can look up too. I have come across a few of these that I love. August Boatright in The Secret Life of Bee's, Alice Henderson in Christy (Also a book everyone needs to read), Atticus Finch from To Kill a Mockingbird, and lastly, this is probably the one you will find most silly before I explain, Albus Dumbledore from the Harry Potter series. These four characters are my all time favorite characters in my all time favorite books. These books are all very different with very different messages, but there is a central and key theme that resonated with me in each and every one of these books. Love. Now, if you have read one or two, if not all, of these, then you may understand but I think that I need to explain myself somewhat. These characters all have something in common. They have a person or group of people who almost, if not outright, idolize them. They are great and wise and they are savvy to the secrets of the world. You could not imagine one of them doing something ridiculous and stupid. Their hearts are conceivably pure and they are just plain impressive to all us screw ups.
Bu that isn't why I like them.
The reason that I love these characters is not because they are perfect, on the contrary, I like them because they aren't. August Boatright lived in a messed up, broken situation. As the oldest of three sisters she was placed into the position of leader. She delt with a sister who is emotionally broken, a sister who is bitter, and is confronted with an even greater struggle when Lilly Owens comes to town (I wont say any more for those of you who haven't read it), as you can see, she is probably stressed. However, she takes it in stride. She responds calmly and speaks truth to those in need of it. Certainly a wise woman. As the quote says, no matter what emotional state it puts her in, August Boatright chooses what matters. From the outside she looks perfect, on the inside shes not. Nothing is.
And for Alice Henderson... She is a highly wise and thoughtful. She is a Quaker who hands wisdom and truth out like candy. Like it is a wonderful life changing secret. Which it is... To Christy Huddleston, she is perfect and knows about life. The perfect Christian. However, when Alice was younger, a teen, she was raped by a man who was supposedly wise and revered for his theological knowledge. She had his baby and spoiled that baby to the point of her running away from the life Alice lived. She wasn't perfect at all. But she was wise... it didn't diminish her knowledge.
Atticus Finch needs no explanation and if you haven't read it you need to get on the ball. However just in case: He is a good father and he is really a good man all around. But he lost his wife and is no stranger to pain and loss and questioning life.
Lastly Albus Dumbledore. If you haven't read the book you have seen the movies (which aren't as good and don't give you as much info) and you know the feeling Dumbledore gives off. He is old and wise and... well... basically, he knows whats up. But he wasn't always like that. He could be responsible for the death of his sister, he was very full of himself as a younger man, and he used to be power hungry (if you didn't know any of this read the books :) hehe). Yet he knows quite a bit and seems like the perfect man. Caring and loving.
So how do these people who had messed up lives and broken families end up being known for their wisdom and ability to love? How did they turn out so right when you, if your like me, see yourself screwing up and lashing out at every turn? And how can we end up like them in the end?
You see, I look up to these characters. I would be happy if I could age like Alice and find myself like her in the end. If I could be a parent someday like Atticus, or teach about life like Dumbledore, or love like August Boatright I would be beyond content. But how do you gain wisdom? How do you become like that even in the midst of a messed up life like Alice and August, buried in deep pain like Atticus, or covered in a thick and suffocating guilt like Dumbledore? I myself have experienced a buffet of all of these things and more. I have been able to sample the whole selection and find that the last thing I feel is wise.
Is there a secret that we're not being told? Are there magic words you have to whisper? I don't think that there is... Personally I think that pain breeds wisdom and making mistakes give you answers. I think that we all, at some point, face the truth or our lives and have to accept what's there. We can take our mistakes and move forward, always changing, or we can let ourselves be pulled into doubt and self loathing. We can accept life and the crap it throws at us, or we can just give up.
The message here, I believe, is not, "You need to be perfect to be wise, and you can never mess up.", but "There is no perfect on earth. Wisdom is the opposite of perfect. If someone is wise, you can bet that they know pain. And, unfortunately, pain is a part of life."
So, earlier I said that the word love was the message that resonated with me. It may seem simple minded and naive of me but I think that love is required for everyone and the world doesn't work without it. All of these characters are wise, but, and I think that these two characteristics go hand in hand, they love people. Alice volunteers her time and dives right into the messy, sad parts of the world so she can help. She exposes herself to the pain of others and feels it with them.
Dumbledore is like this as well. He sacrifices of himself for others and he believes in the good of people, a form of love. Atticus loves and August certainly loves beyond reason.
Maybe in order to become wise we have to love and sacrifice. It seems that we must become selfless. A difficult task indeed... But ,really, would it not be worth it?
-KC-
― The Secret Life of Bee's by Sue Monk Kidd
I absolutely love this book. I have just finished it for the millionth time. Really it is a book everyone should read. Every girl anyway. There are some really amazing life lessons in it, its like even the simplest things seem profound when coming from the mouth of August Boatright. As an avid reader, you sometimes come across a character who is so real and to whom you can look up too. I have come across a few of these that I love. August Boatright in The Secret Life of Bee's, Alice Henderson in Christy (Also a book everyone needs to read), Atticus Finch from To Kill a Mockingbird, and lastly, this is probably the one you will find most silly before I explain, Albus Dumbledore from the Harry Potter series. These four characters are my all time favorite characters in my all time favorite books. These books are all very different with very different messages, but there is a central and key theme that resonated with me in each and every one of these books. Love. Now, if you have read one or two, if not all, of these, then you may understand but I think that I need to explain myself somewhat. These characters all have something in common. They have a person or group of people who almost, if not outright, idolize them. They are great and wise and they are savvy to the secrets of the world. You could not imagine one of them doing something ridiculous and stupid. Their hearts are conceivably pure and they are just plain impressive to all us screw ups.
Bu that isn't why I like them.
The reason that I love these characters is not because they are perfect, on the contrary, I like them because they aren't. August Boatright lived in a messed up, broken situation. As the oldest of three sisters she was placed into the position of leader. She delt with a sister who is emotionally broken, a sister who is bitter, and is confronted with an even greater struggle when Lilly Owens comes to town (I wont say any more for those of you who haven't read it), as you can see, she is probably stressed. However, she takes it in stride. She responds calmly and speaks truth to those in need of it. Certainly a wise woman. As the quote says, no matter what emotional state it puts her in, August Boatright chooses what matters. From the outside she looks perfect, on the inside shes not. Nothing is.
And for Alice Henderson... She is a highly wise and thoughtful. She is a Quaker who hands wisdom and truth out like candy. Like it is a wonderful life changing secret. Which it is... To Christy Huddleston, she is perfect and knows about life. The perfect Christian. However, when Alice was younger, a teen, she was raped by a man who was supposedly wise and revered for his theological knowledge. She had his baby and spoiled that baby to the point of her running away from the life Alice lived. She wasn't perfect at all. But she was wise... it didn't diminish her knowledge.
Atticus Finch needs no explanation and if you haven't read it you need to get on the ball. However just in case: He is a good father and he is really a good man all around. But he lost his wife and is no stranger to pain and loss and questioning life.
Lastly Albus Dumbledore. If you haven't read the book you have seen the movies (which aren't as good and don't give you as much info) and you know the feeling Dumbledore gives off. He is old and wise and... well... basically, he knows whats up. But he wasn't always like that. He could be responsible for the death of his sister, he was very full of himself as a younger man, and he used to be power hungry (if you didn't know any of this read the books :) hehe). Yet he knows quite a bit and seems like the perfect man. Caring and loving.
So how do these people who had messed up lives and broken families end up being known for their wisdom and ability to love? How did they turn out so right when you, if your like me, see yourself screwing up and lashing out at every turn? And how can we end up like them in the end?
You see, I look up to these characters. I would be happy if I could age like Alice and find myself like her in the end. If I could be a parent someday like Atticus, or teach about life like Dumbledore, or love like August Boatright I would be beyond content. But how do you gain wisdom? How do you become like that even in the midst of a messed up life like Alice and August, buried in deep pain like Atticus, or covered in a thick and suffocating guilt like Dumbledore? I myself have experienced a buffet of all of these things and more. I have been able to sample the whole selection and find that the last thing I feel is wise.
Is there a secret that we're not being told? Are there magic words you have to whisper? I don't think that there is... Personally I think that pain breeds wisdom and making mistakes give you answers. I think that we all, at some point, face the truth or our lives and have to accept what's there. We can take our mistakes and move forward, always changing, or we can let ourselves be pulled into doubt and self loathing. We can accept life and the crap it throws at us, or we can just give up.
The message here, I believe, is not, "You need to be perfect to be wise, and you can never mess up.", but "There is no perfect on earth. Wisdom is the opposite of perfect. If someone is wise, you can bet that they know pain. And, unfortunately, pain is a part of life."
So, earlier I said that the word love was the message that resonated with me. It may seem simple minded and naive of me but I think that love is required for everyone and the world doesn't work without it. All of these characters are wise, but, and I think that these two characteristics go hand in hand, they love people. Alice volunteers her time and dives right into the messy, sad parts of the world so she can help. She exposes herself to the pain of others and feels it with them.
Dumbledore is like this as well. He sacrifices of himself for others and he believes in the good of people, a form of love. Atticus loves and August certainly loves beyond reason.
Maybe in order to become wise we have to love and sacrifice. It seems that we must become selfless. A difficult task indeed... But ,really, would it not be worth it?
-KC-
Wednesday, May 2, 2012
The Beef Jerky Conundrum
Beef Jerky has to be the most disgusting looking food ever. I look at the gross looking little pieces of dried out beef and I think, what is in this? It can't all be beef... It can't. But then I taste it and stop caring because its amazing. I say this because a friend of mine gave me the last few pieces out of her bag and as I was sitting there, with my Pepsi and bag of jerky, a question began to gnaw at my mind. What was that little white packet in the bottom of the bag? It clearly says do not eat... I got that much, I'm not retarded, but I searched all over that little packet and could not find it's purpose anywhere on its surface. So, of course, and out of boredom more than anything else, I went on a cyber-adventure! I automatically assumed that it was too keep the product fresh, but there had to be more to it than that. It was toxic, so I couldn't ingest it... what was it made of? My second thought after "What was it?" was, is it safe to eat beef jerky? Could it give me cancer or poison my bloodstream? If it is toxic then why is it in the food? This was certainly a conundrum worth looking into. So, like any true member of the 21st century, I turned to Google. I entered a few keywords into the search engine and pressed "Search". I was rewarded with 5 sites trying to sell me beef jerky, 3 sites, including a blog, telling me how to make beef jerky, and finally I found a link titled, "Silica Gel Packets: How Dangerous are these Inserts?".
"Silica Gel packets, eh?" hmmmmm...... So I I clicked on the link. I discovered that the gel packets are found in everything, including dry foods, shoe boxes, cell phones, camera cases, cat litter, medicine bottles, etc. I'm seriously thinking of taking beef jerky out of my diet at this point of my cyber-adventure.I felt this way until the article stated that the white stuff was okay. If, for some reason, you decided to eat it anyway (the chick who sued McDonald's and the guy that is stupid enough to eat it anyway could get together) it would only cause you to be extremely thirsty and would most likely not cause you any severe medical harm. However, my theory is a little bit more out there. Did any of you watch that episode of Dr. Who back in the Tennant days called "The Waters of Mars"? For those of you who haven't let me clarify. In this episode, Tennant goes to mars in the future. The people on the planet are being infected by a water creature that inhabits its victims and makes them crazy for water. It was gross in a cool way! They shoot water at the uninfected, thus infecting them. They become dried out and... hmmm... I'm having trouble explaining it. Here's a picture. I realized that these symptoms are just like those of the monsters on this show.The people on Mars who got infected were explorers. They were astronauts in space. Of course they were eating
| Gross, Huh? |
Really though... It makes perfect sense. These monsters were incredibly thirsty. The article I found clearly states that the main symptom of ingesting the gel is extreme thirst, also the gel is used to keep the product dry and fresh. Do you see this guys face? Defiantly dried out...
I think that I am onto something here! Can you imagine? I bet the creators of Jack Links feels stupid now...
Its almost enough to make me stop eating beef jerky. But lets face it. I'm a consumer. Here's an example, I absolutely hated the first Halo game. I thought that it was boring and, I'm sorry for all you fans, dumb. But I continued to buy them, assuming that the next one would be better. I did this for years and when ODST and Reach came out I bought those too. Why, you may ask? In a word, tradition. I had all the others. Why not buy these too (You should know that I ended up loving Reach)? So, when I am told that Coke will dissolve my stomach and give my ulcers, I continue to drink it, when I am told that the movie version of Hunger Games sucks I buy the six dollar ticket and watch it anyway, and when I realize that beef jerky will cause me to become a water obsessed, ugly monster... I eat it anyway. I mean really, it might actually be cool to be a monster. Who knows what monsters think about? Maybe they like it...
Nah, who am I kidding, unless your the rich evil villain like Lex Luther, you probably don't enjoy being a monster. This really is a vicious circle isn't it? Is there no way for me to win besides eating soggy jerky?! Is there no end to the horror!
So there you go folks... Eat jerky at your own discretion!
-KC-
Wednesday, April 25, 2012
"The Hills are Alive..."
Just in case your wondering, yes... I did go home and watch old episodes of Fringe. Writing about just it put me in a Fringe mood. I tried to figure out what mine and my brothers doubles names would be. Like Olivia's double is Folivia and Walters is Walternate. How could you do Kacie?... I have no idea and I came up with nothing... If ya have ideas post em!
Did any of you play with the zipper on Google yesterday? Because it distracted everyone, including me, in my class at ICTC for a full five minutes. I hate to admit it, but I am very easily amused...
So I have more of my story written, I will put it below as always. I had some trouble with this next excerpt because that was as far as I had planned. What you are about to read is new... There was no outline for it (honestly there hardly ever is) and was the product of several cups of coffee, brainstorming, and my crazy imagination. Oh wait... I guess nothings new... never mind.
I decided that I wanted to eat amazing food in Italy, to just hang out in Ireland (I love their accent), and then I wanted to run around on the hills like in The Sound of Music in Austria and sing, "The hills are alive, with the sound of music" at the top of my lungs.It would be a pretty good year, however, I'm not sure if I met the requirements for the essay...
Untitled still has no name can ya tell? I just don't know (sigh)...
Here it is, Untitled Continued:
Annie was ushered into the room quickly, the hands of her nurse pushing firmly into her back. She forced her thoughts about the girl to the back of her mind as fear pushed it's way forward taking over control of her concentration and her thoughts.
She saw the nurse from earlier. She wondered about the girl he liked and if he had gotten to see her during his lunch hour. By the expression on his face, she doubted it. Dr. Sinclair was there as well, which scared her even more. She was put into a chair and told to remain quiet. All of their voices (out loud and otherwise) were frantic and busy and stressed out. She wondered why until she picked out one voice, the burger guy. His voice was panicked... but not like everyone else's. He was more nervous than confused. He kept looking around and peaking over his shoulder every once in a while. She usually tried to avoid reading peoples thoughts if she could help it, but this time she pried into his mind. He stole her file. He was planning on looking through it and seeing where she came from! She couldn't contain herself; she bounced in her seat, her eyes growing wide... He could tell her who she was! She tried to catch his eyes but he wouldn't look her way. In fact he avoided eye contact with anyone. He had stolen her file... why was he interested in why she was here? She saw images of Sinclair and the nurse, Ethan, discussing her vision of the little girl, which hadn't stopped, the girl was still there beside her, Sinclair had made Ethan mad because he planned to make money off of her. Of course Annie had always known this. It was practically all he thought about when he was around her. At first, before she had gained the ability to read minds, she'd misinterpreted his joy. She thought (she was young) that Sinclair had just liked her. At that time she was cooperative, when she had realized other wise, she just stopped. He hadn't liked that. So he made her. He used cruel methods to make her behave, like electric shock and revoking her meals... he was not above starving someone to gain the results he wanted.
After a stern look from her nurse she resumed sitting still and being quiet.
Did any of you play with the zipper on Google yesterday? Because it distracted everyone, including me, in my class at ICTC for a full five minutes. I hate to admit it, but I am very easily amused...
So I have more of my story written, I will put it below as always. I had some trouble with this next excerpt because that was as far as I had planned. What you are about to read is new... There was no outline for it (honestly there hardly ever is) and was the product of several cups of coffee, brainstorming, and my crazy imagination. Oh wait... I guess nothings new... never mind.
Before I get into the story, however, I would like to talk about something. I don't think I've ever talked about this, but I am attending High School and a Tech School. I go to Westville, OK Public schools and Indian Capital Technology Center in Stilwell, OK (ICTC). I absolutely love ICTC because despite the fact that I am a teen I get more freedom and responsibility. The teachers at ICTC expect me to be responsible and I, weirdly enough, love that. However, unfortunately, I still have to attend High school. No getting out of it. So, of course, I still have to take EOI's (End of the year Instruction). They suck. I don't know how many of you reading this have to take them, but they really are awful. At Westville, you are required to pass a certain amount of EOI's before you are allowed to graduate. They are hard and boring and I really do hate them. I always take a book for when I finish my test and I always end up reading for an hour and a half... It's really boring. Anyhoo, back to the point. I had to take one today. It was the essay portion of my English test. Writing has always come naturally to me so I have never failed an English or essay assignment. I always pass with flying colors and receive an above average score. I also end up sitting there board, reading a book for about two hours.
Actually before I say this you should know that the pamphlet the teachers read before the test says not to discuss the test to anyone... I don't remember signing anything but who knows i could have... read at your own discretion, hehe.
Now you can Imagine my surprise when today I get a stupid prompt (the subject I have to write about) and have absolutely not idea how to respond to it or how to put it into five paragraph format. You see I was told before the test that it would be a persuasive essay. I would have to give three reasons why i like or did not like\want something or why I think that we should do something different.. Its always something like that... This was an Expository essay. I had to write about how I would use a years vacation from school in between high school and college. How do you put that in a five paragraph format? Intro, body (3 paragraphs), and conclusion... I ended up putting three things that I would want to do (in this case places that I would want to travel), then my body was a paragraph per place (Italy, Ireland, and Austria), then my conclusion. The conclusion is always the hardest part for me.
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| The Hills are Alive..." |
Untitled still has no name can ya tell? I just don't know (sigh)...
Here it is, Untitled Continued:
Annie was ushered into the room quickly, the hands of her nurse pushing firmly into her back. She forced her thoughts about the girl to the back of her mind as fear pushed it's way forward taking over control of her concentration and her thoughts.
She saw the nurse from earlier. She wondered about the girl he liked and if he had gotten to see her during his lunch hour. By the expression on his face, she doubted it. Dr. Sinclair was there as well, which scared her even more. She was put into a chair and told to remain quiet. All of their voices (out loud and otherwise) were frantic and busy and stressed out. She wondered why until she picked out one voice, the burger guy. His voice was panicked... but not like everyone else's. He was more nervous than confused. He kept looking around and peaking over his shoulder every once in a while. She usually tried to avoid reading peoples thoughts if she could help it, but this time she pried into his mind. He stole her file. He was planning on looking through it and seeing where she came from! She couldn't contain herself; she bounced in her seat, her eyes growing wide... He could tell her who she was! She tried to catch his eyes but he wouldn't look her way. In fact he avoided eye contact with anyone. He had stolen her file... why was he interested in why she was here? She saw images of Sinclair and the nurse, Ethan, discussing her vision of the little girl, which hadn't stopped, the girl was still there beside her, Sinclair had made Ethan mad because he planned to make money off of her. Of course Annie had always known this. It was practically all he thought about when he was around her. At first, before she had gained the ability to read minds, she'd misinterpreted his joy. She thought (she was young) that Sinclair had just liked her. At that time she was cooperative, when she had realized other wise, she just stopped. He hadn't liked that. So he made her. He used cruel methods to make her behave, like electric shock and revoking her meals... he was not above starving someone to gain the results he wanted.
After a stern look from her nurse she resumed sitting still and being quiet.
Sorry, that's all I have at the moment. Thanks for your time :)!
-KC-
Tuesday, April 24, 2012
My Brain Sucks at Chess...
I just did something bad. Well, bad for me. It doesn't really affect anyone else. Here's the excruciating and painful story. Reader discretion is advised.
I will begin by telling you that I love the T.V show 'Fringe'. When our love affair began it wasn't one of those instances where you see the commercials, think, "Well that looks good.", watch it and love it. No, I thought that it looked stupid and uninteresting when it first came out. I was unimpressed and just never watched it. My brother, on the other hand, watched it and loved it, so when it came out on DVD he rented the first season and watched the episodes ten billion times apiece. He eventually won me over and got me to watch an episode with him while we were eating lunch. From the first time Peter Bishop (Joshua Jackson) hit the screen I was hooked. After I got over how hot Peter was I realized that I was enjoying
the story line. Holy crap I was getting into it! Well, of course my first instinct was to pretend like it was awful in front of my brother. I could not let him know that he was right. But I had to finish the season because I was officially hooked. So what could a girl do but wait until her brother was asleep and steal it from his movie shelf in his room? Needless to say he caught me. I got over the embarrassment and finished the season in less than a week. Then came season two and season three. The show was filled with crazy ups and downs and drama and some really disgusting and graphic murders\biological warfare stuff... Walter came into the show and instantly became my favorite character (this was in season one)! Olivia Dunham (Anna Torv) was my second favorite, what girl doesn't support the super strong and smart female lead? As you can see I was addicted.
Now the last episode that I saw was the conclusion of season three. I'm not sure why we didn't watch season four on T.V but we didn't. I guess there was never time, and by the time they began five It was too late... I was too far behind.
The painful part is that four days ago was Friday, and Friday is when Fringe comes on. I watched it... I experienced a very weak moment and I just couldn't make my finger push the channel button on the remote. It wouldn't budge. For that five seconds of indecision my finger remained poised above the button, my brain saying, "Change the Channel... NOW!" My heart saying, "Just watch long enough to see if Peter and Olivia are back together..." And so it went for five whole seconds. A heated chess game between my heart and my head. My heart won. I watched the entire episode. Beginning to end. It confused the crap out of me.
And, of course, it doesn't end there. In the episode I watched last Friday Peter and Olivia's daughter (I knew they got together) and her friend got Walter and Peter out of a block of amber, the Observers took over earth (I'm convinced that cows are in cahoots with the Observers), and I was going crazy!!!!! Ingrid (their daughter) has to be influenced by cortexiphan like Olivia in some way because she was able to hide her thoughts from the Observers... My theory is that the drug is somehow hereditary and is in her bloodstream too. Also, and I cannot stress enough how much this confuses me , William Bell is back...?!? How the heck did that happen?! Wasn't he dead the last time I saw him? Ummm... yes... yes he was. The last time Bell was in an episode I've seen he was in Olivia's consciousness. He made her drink soul magnates or something and his soul was drawn to her by the sound of a bell. You can see how far behind I am. So what happened? Did they reanimate his body somehow? Because that was all of William Bell, not just his soul, that I saw stuck in amber.
As most of you know, once you have begun doing something your not supposed to, stopping gets harder and harder... like the proverbial child, looking through poorly guarded Christmas presents in his parents closet, I couldn't stop looking for updates on Fringe. I googled it... that has to be the most often used phrase of Americans today. "Google it"... Our answer for everything.
I found way more information than I needed. The web does not save you from yourself. It enables you... big time. I found a full overview of Fringe season one through four. I was happy until I realized that I was spoiling the whole thing.
And in order to stop myself I decided to blog about it. And here we are.
You have undoubtedly realized by now that I have no willpower. I am a weak, weak, woman. I will probably have to go home now and watch some Fringe re-runs to pacify myself.
-KC-
I will begin by telling you that I love the T.V show 'Fringe'. When our love affair began it wasn't one of those instances where you see the commercials, think, "Well that looks good.", watch it and love it. No, I thought that it looked stupid and uninteresting when it first came out. I was unimpressed and just never watched it. My brother, on the other hand, watched it and loved it, so when it came out on DVD he rented the first season and watched the episodes ten billion times apiece. He eventually won me over and got me to watch an episode with him while we were eating lunch. From the first time Peter Bishop (Joshua Jackson) hit the screen I was hooked. After I got over how hot Peter was I realized that I was enjoying
 |
| Joshua Jackson |
 |
| Anna Torv |
 |
| John Noble |
Now the last episode that I saw was the conclusion of season three. I'm not sure why we didn't watch season four on T.V but we didn't. I guess there was never time, and by the time they began five It was too late... I was too far behind.
The painful part is that four days ago was Friday, and Friday is when Fringe comes on. I watched it... I experienced a very weak moment and I just couldn't make my finger push the channel button on the remote. It wouldn't budge. For that five seconds of indecision my finger remained poised above the button, my brain saying, "Change the Channel... NOW!" My heart saying, "Just watch long enough to see if Peter and Olivia are back together..." And so it went for five whole seconds. A heated chess game between my heart and my head. My heart won. I watched the entire episode. Beginning to end. It confused the crap out of me.
And, of course, it doesn't end there. In the episode I watched last Friday Peter and Olivia's daughter (I knew they got together) and her friend got Walter and Peter out of a block of amber, the Observers took over earth (I'm convinced that cows are in cahoots with the Observers), and I was going crazy!!!!! Ingrid (their daughter) has to be influenced by cortexiphan like Olivia in some way because she was able to hide her thoughts from the Observers... My theory is that the drug is somehow hereditary and is in her bloodstream too. Also, and I cannot stress enough how much this confuses me , William Bell is back...?!? How the heck did that happen?! Wasn't he dead the last time I saw him? Ummm... yes... yes he was. The last time Bell was in an episode I've seen he was in Olivia's consciousness. He made her drink soul magnates or something and his soul was drawn to her by the sound of a bell. You can see how far behind I am. So what happened? Did they reanimate his body somehow? Because that was all of William Bell, not just his soul, that I saw stuck in amber.
As most of you know, once you have begun doing something your not supposed to, stopping gets harder and harder... like the proverbial child, looking through poorly guarded Christmas presents in his parents closet, I couldn't stop looking for updates on Fringe. I googled it... that has to be the most often used phrase of Americans today. "Google it"... Our answer for everything.
I found way more information than I needed. The web does not save you from yourself. It enables you... big time. I found a full overview of Fringe season one through four. I was happy until I realized that I was spoiling the whole thing.
And in order to stop myself I decided to blog about it. And here we are.
You have undoubtedly realized by now that I have no willpower. I am a weak, weak, woman. I will probably have to go home now and watch some Fringe re-runs to pacify myself.
-KC-
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